Five Minute Friday: Worth

When I was a teen, I used the bathroom as a hiding place when things got too intense.

I hid there on dates. I hid there at prom. I hid there almost every night family stuff got too heavy.

In the bathroom, I struggled with my identity. My head knowledge told me I was a child of God. But my broken heart told me I wasn’t worth very much.

I had to learn that I was worth protecting.  I was worth defending.  I was worth cherishing.  I didn’t feel that way growing up as a child of divorce.  I felt abandoned, unprotected, not worthy of focused attention.  I was stuck in emotional survival mode of taking whatever love I could get, even when others took advantage of me.

When my sense of self-worth was restored through years of Bible study and therapy, I learned to protect and defend it.  I learned to be assertive and speak out against toxic patterns.  I couldn’t afford to hide any longer if I wanted to be the strong, capable woman that God called me to be.

I don’t hide in bathrooms anymore.  When conflict arises, I calmly confront if the situation warrants.  This has taken years of practice and courage. I’ve dealt with plenty of pushback, but I’ve gained my freedom.

The teenage girl inside me didn’t recognize her worth.  But I know my worth in Christ now, and I’m living life out in the open.

Questions for reflection:

As a teen, how healthy was your sense of self-worth?

How has God healed you from past seasons of low self-worth?

***

You’ll find the Women Who Jesus Loved series here every Wednesday morning through the end of July.

Read the three posts in this series:

Portrait of a Shamed Woman

Portrait of a Desperate Woman

Portrait of Mary, mother of Jesus

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  • Alisa Nicaud

    I can so identify with that teenage girl, Sarah! My parents divorced when I was in 4th grade and I felt all the same things you did. Praise God we can be secure in Him and have our identity and worth rooted in Him. Thanks for sharing this at Lyli’s site today.

  • Add another voice to carrying the scars of divorce. What a beautiful story of restoration and courage Sarah. He has given you great value. Thank you for sharing your story – it’s a gift of great value.

  • gabriele

    What great questions you asked at the end of your post. I was an adult before I believed that I was always worthy of love and belonging. It is a common yet unique battle for each of us.

  • Calvonia Radford

    Hello Sarah! I hid in the bathroom as a newly married woman. I hid there for years. Thank God I now know my worth in Christ and I only retrieve to my old hiding place to pray and meditate on God’s word. Thank God for his abundant love that never fails.

  • Susan

    Your heart is clearly revealed in your writing. I’m sharing this with someone. Excellent.

  • Julie Loos

    I hid behind a mask for years. It was lonely not being the real me! So glad God is showing me who I am to Him! Visiting from #DancewithJesus

  • Amy Jung

    Sarah, I too had little self-worth. It has taken me years of study and healing to regain what was lost. I appreciate you sharing your story. It tells others with this common issue that there is healing!

  • Oh boy…I had no idea who I was as a teen. I was so confused. So hurt. So full of shame. I am so thankful for the healing power of Jesus Christ! He redeems! Thanks for sharing on Grace and Truth, Sarah.

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