The darkness, 1993

quote card Psalm 23.4

“Everyone is too busy to miss me,” I told myself

on those late afternoons when I was home alone.

“No one cares, no one understands,

and no one truly loves the real me.”

I went to the cabinet, counted the bottles

of pain relievers, estimated

how many it would take

to put me to sleep forever.

I turned the bottles round and round,

heard the pills rattle inside

like a snake who warns you

when you step too close.

I laid in my bed yesterday

and contemplated the cleanness

of that kind of escape,

no blood, no mess, no detailing,

just a drift away into oblivion.

Suddenly I felt a still, warm presence

hovering above and within me

and a calm, firm voice spoke directly

to my spirit:

You don’t need to think like this anymore.

I listened and obeyed

and I felt God’s strong arms

lifting me out of the pit.

When I sat up

I felt stronger and lighter

as the weight lifted from my chest.

Now I see the sun peeking out

between the thick grey clouds.

I’m never going back

into that dark pit anymore.

 

Images and text copyright 2016 Sarah Geringer

You might also like

12 Days of Christmas Memories: Marriage

September 30, 2016

A Prayer for Peaceful Expectations

December 9, 2016

Loneliness and Longing, Part 2

May 6, 2016