Be His Comfort

You can serve your husband as a special comfort. #marriage #valentine

Welcome!  I’m glad you’ve joined me for day 7 of this 10-day series, “How to Be the Wife He Really Wants.”

Do you know God designed you to be a comfort to your husband?

Your presence is a unique comfort to him when he’s suffering.  When he reaches for your embrace, it’s like a homecoming for his heart.

The Old Testament holds a beautiful story of comfort in marriage.  After Sarah died, Abraham sent his servant to choose a wife for his son, Isaac, who was in mourning.  God helped Abraham’s servant find a beautiful, servant-hearted woman named Rebekah.  She was willing to leave her old life behind and begin a new life with Isaac.

Take a look at this scripture passage, which describes Isaac and Rebekah’s first meeting:

[Isaac] went out to the field one evening to meditate, and as he looked up, he saw camels approaching. Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac. She got down from her camel and asked the servant, “Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?”

“He is my master,” the servant answered. So she took her veil and covered herself.

Then the servant told Isaac all he had done. Isaac brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he married Rebekah. So she became his wife, and he loved her; and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.

Genesis 24:63-67 NIV

I’ve always loved this beautiful story.  Rebekah comforted Isaac in a way no one else could do.  That’s how God designed you: to provide His comfort to your husband through your love and respect.

Life is hard for your husband, as you well know.  He faces enormous pressures at work, in relationships, and inside his heart.  When I watched the movie “American Sniper,” I was deeply moved by how much the husband valued his wife’s comfort after facing fierce battles.  My husband isn’t in a literal war-zone every day, but he certainly faces ordinary battles on a regular basis.  They wear him down, sap his strength, and dim his hope.  My role is to comfort him and give him relief from the grind of life.

Listen to this quote from The Best Advice I Ever Got on Marriage,

God did not give me my spouse as part of the grind; rather, [my wife] and I are going through the grinder of life together.  In the same way, you do not have to choose between life and a spouse.  You can enjoy life with your spouse in the midst of the grind: “Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun (Eccl. 9:9).”

How can you comfort him in his suffering, and help him enjoy life in the midst of the grind? Here are three ways I’m comforting my husband in his struggles:

  • Telling him I’m praying for him. I want him to know he’s being lifted up to God through my prayers.  Then I follow through by praying for him and his struggles in my morning commute.
  • Listening well.  In our 17 years together, I’ve learned to listen and not interrupt.  I’ve learned to ask fewer questions as to not overwhelm him, and ask more thoughtful questions too.  I listen for the feelings underneath what he’s saying, then I pray accordingly.
  • Giving him physical affection.  My husband’s #1 love language is physical touch.  Hugging him, scratching his back, and snuggling with him daily provides him unique comfort he doesn’t receive from anyone else.

What practical step can you take today to be a comfort to YOUR husband?  I would love to hear your suggestions in the comments below!


Join me tomorrow for Day 8, Be His Sister in Christ.  And catch up on last week’s posts too!

Photo generously provided by Lillian at Embracing the Lovely.  Visit her site for more beauty and inspiration!

Looking for Newness of Life in your current life season?

My book Newness of Life will help you apply Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 so you can understand God’s plan in your current season.

There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens.”  Ecclesiastes 3:1 NIV

No matter what season you are in, God is teaching you valuable lessons to grow your faith and trust in Him.  We will discover what God is saying through the different times and activities we traverse.

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  • I am so glad you pointed out the comfort Isaac found in Rebekah’s love, Sarah. I can’t say that I have ‘seen’ that before. And I love that about Scripture, the way we learn something new every time because we are learning to attend to what He has for us. One of the best ways of loving my husband, aside from praying for him, is to make sure he leaves the house with encouragement. I need him to know I am grateful as much as he needs to know it. 🙂 It is a beautiful thing when we know that we are their best encouragement.


    • Sarah

      Thanks Dawn! Glad to know I helped you find something fresh in this scripture. Blessings to you friend!

  • What beautiful, practical, heart advice for marriage! I love that we can become better equipped to love our husbands by modeling the love in the Bible. Your thoughts here are so impactful. Thank you!

    • Sarah

      Thanks Rebecca! Your comment is so sweet. I’m glad this post is helping you!